Supermarket woes

You know what I love at the grocery store? (Besides the candy aisle, I mean.) Normal and polite grocery cashiers who check me out quickly and are attentive and polite.

You know what I don't like at the grocery store?

1. cashiers who won't look me in the eye, and won't even say 'hello' unless I say it first

2. cashiers talking incessantly to the bagger, the cashier in the next lane, the co-worker walking by

3. cashiers who just look cranky and like they'd rather be anywhere else than checking out my stupid groceries

4. cashiers who are way too friendly and keep talking to me (in a non-solicited way) long after my stuff is bagged and paid for and I'm ready to get outta there.

And then there's a number 5, which is this kid I had check me out the other day at HEB, who I'm sure had good intentions, but drove me absolutely bonkers. He was of the overly friendly, way too helpful, creepy type.

I walked up to the checkout lane with my cart of groceries, and Roman in the kid seat. He came out from his spot behind the cash register and gave Roman 2 buddy bucks AND a buddy bucks book. Roman didn't care about the book and just took the buddy bucks, but the kid wasn't taking no for an answer and had to open up the book and point out all the cool prizes to Roman. Then when Roman still didn't care about the book, and he wasn't quitting, I finally said, "Here, I'll take it," so he'd stop already and go check out my groceries.

But no. He then proceeded to help me unload everything from my cart onto the belt. It was really awkward and quite maddening actually, because GEEZ KID, get up there and ring up my stuff! But also? He kept reaching for stuff in the same spot that I was going for, so his hand would go down and then recoil, and then reach again, and then pull back. And worst of all was when he went to grab the little box in the corner of the cart, which was a 'feminine product', and then pulled back because he didn't want to pick it up.

Only when that was the last thing left in the cart did he finally go to the cash register and ring up my purchases. And he talked the entire time. I lost count of how many times he said, "Boy, that sure is a lot of Fruity Pebbles!" (It was on sale for a dollar a box so I bought quite a few boxes, but do we seriously have to mention it once for every box?!) Thankfully there was no commentary on my feminine product. (Hey, maybe he felt so awkward about that that he couldn't think of anything to talk about except the cereal?)

I went and bagged up the groceries as fast as I could so I could get out of there, but alas, I just wasn't fast enough, and we got to play the dodging hands game again while he reached for the items that I was already putting in bags. (Dude, do you see me bagging the fruit? Don't grab the fruit then!)

Eventually everything was packed up and I got the blazes out of there, but seriously, I will be watching out for that guy in the future and choosing another lane.